Cross Dresser’s Wives December’s Newsletter 2010 Topic For The Month - Dressing While Stressing

During the flurry of the holiday season, everything escalates. While dealing with company, travel, religious activities, shopping, cooking, wrapping gifts, and keeping the kids busy while out of school, the cross dresser's wife will most likely carry even more stress than the average wife and mother. She might be forced to ask herself...

How will my cross dressing husband handle his additional holiday stress? According to statistics, studies, questionnaires and posts from our worldwide forum, a cross dresser is much more likely to find relief through cross dressing when he is stressed.

Hustle and bustle can mean more stress with less opportunity to relieve it.

Be prepared, have your eyes wide open, and recognize where your husband's additional holiday stress may truly be stemming from. Also, if your husband is walking around relieved today after being stressed out yesterday, he may have found time to do more than simply hang out beneath the mistletoe.

Knowledge will empower your actions which can change your life for the better. 2011 and beyond!

Happiest of Holidays & Best Wishes To All,

The Founder

_______________________________

FREE PHONE CONSULTATION

We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April, we began Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences, and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, she is a former cross dresser’s wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.

CONSULTATION TESTIMONIALS

"...the hour I spent speaking with you made me feel better than the year I spent in therapy."

"...after my consultation with the founder, I realized my therapist was not the expert on cross dressers wives - the founder was."

"…the advice I received from the founder about setting boundaries was a big help to my marriage."

"Thank you founder for providing much needed resources for me."

"...I cannot tell you how blessed I felt to have someone I could talk to about this that has shared this experience."

_______________________________

DONATIONS AND VOLUNTEERS

Make a donation in your honor to help forward the work of this very important organization. 2011 will be our biggest year yet!

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands.) A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.

_______________________________

BOOK UPDATE

Our publishing contract has been signed!

After much due diligence and meeting with some extremely creative and exciting experts, our final cover design is being crafted!

We have received an additional story! It is currently being edited and will not push back our publication date!

The book will be out first quarter 2011!

Every thanks in the world to the cross dressers' wives who have bravely contributed their anonymous stories; and to all wives and partners who have contributed to our forum and made it the worldwide power-base for cross dressers' wives struggling with this issue.

With blessings and gratitude,

The Founder

_______________________________

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE

"All the answers to all the questions you are ever going to ask are right here within you. Every time you say, I don't know, you shut the door to your own wisdom." (Heart Thoughts by Louise Hay, p. 78.)

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CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This communication and any attachments may contain information that is legally privileged or confidential and is intended only for the use of the individual or entity to whom it is addressed. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, dissemination, distribution, copying or disclosure of this communication and any attachments is strictly prohibited. If you have received this in error, please notify us immediately then permanently delete this communication. Thank you.

crossdresserswives.com

Cross Dresser’s Wives November’s Newsletter 2010 Topic For The Month – Revenge? Think twice…

Over the years, there have been forum posts about getting revenge on someone’s cross dressing husband or ex-husband. “Sweet is revenge,” said the infamous Lord Byron, author of Don Juan.

According to many social researchers, most people’s fantasies involving revenge towards someone who has betrayed them results in a satisfied emotional state. However, the results of many tests indicate that if one chooses to act on vengeful thoughts, it is not gratifying. Instead, revenge can and often does make people feel worse. Many believe forgiveness is divine…

If a cross dresser’s wife is seeking revenge, living well is the best form! So, live well ladies!

Blessings,
The Founder

_____________________________________


FREE PHONE CONSULTATION

We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April, we began Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences, and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, she is a former cross dresser’s wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting cdwives@gmail.com. The basic fee is $50 an hour.

CONSULTATION TESTIMONIALS

"...the hour I spent speaking with you made me feel better than the year I spent in therapy."

"...after my consultation with the founder, I realized my therapist was not the expert on cross dressers wives - the founder was."

"…the advice I received from the founder about setting boundaries was a big help to my marriage."

"Thank you founder for providing much needed resources for me."

"...I cannot tell you how blessed I felt to have someone I could talk to about this that has shared this experience."

_____________________________________


DONATIONS AND VOLUNTEERS

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands.) A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.

_____________________________________


BOOK UPDATE

Dear Authors,

Again, many thanks to you, our contributing authors, for sharing your brave stories. Guess what? We just received a commitment for an additional story! In addition, queries have been sent regarding someone inspirational to write our Forward. We are still open to suggestions. All in all, we are more convinced than ever that our end result will be a powerful and enlightening tome. We are steadily getting closer to publication!

In addition, we would like to reiterate that every means possible is being taken to ensure anonymity; all identities of those involved are indeed well camouflaged. To repeat, it is not the intention of the upcoming book(s) to disparage, reveal, or “out” anyone, only to share the emotional tunnels dug in order for these wives to survive. By sharing with others like us and not like us, it is our hope to cast more understanding on this issue. Truly horrifying twists and turns can await the unwitting cross dresser’s wife if the secret is buried too deep. It should not have to be this way.

Stay tuned for updates on our sure to be best-selling book about our secret lives as cross dressers wives!

With blessings and gratitude,
The Founder

_____________________________________


INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE

“I have the courage to focus on beauty even in the midst of pain.” (Sue Patton Thoele’s The Woman’s Book Of Courage, p. 231).

Cross Dresser’s Wives October’s Newsletter 2010 Topic For The Month - Halloween

Since our inception, Cross Dresser’s Wives has received over 1000 responses to our Questionnaire. Question #4 asks ‘Looking back, what signs did you miss or ignore prior to discovering your partner was a cross-dresser?’ Overwhelmingly, many cross dresser’s wives responded that their husbands insisted on dressing up as women every year. However, cross dressers are far from a monolithic group; NOT all men who wear female costumes on Halloween are cross dressers. However, it is a significant night for many cross dressers. Halloween provides them with the freedom of dressing up as they wish while still keeping their secret.


Trick or Treat?

The Founder


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FREE PHONE CONSULTATION


We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April, we began Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences, and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, she is a former cross dresser’s wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.



CONSULTATION TESTIMONIALS


"...the hour I spent speaking with you made me feel better than the year I spent in therapy."



"...after my consultation with the founder, I realized my therapist was not the expert on cross dressers wives - the founder was."



"…the advice I received from the founder about setting boundaries was a big help to my marriage."



"Thank you founder for providing much needed resources for me."



"...I cannot tell you how blessed I felt to have someone I could talk to about this that has shared this experience."



_______________________________



DONATIONS AND VOLUNTEERS



We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands.) A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.



_______________________________



BOOK UPDATE



Dear Authors,



Again, many thanks to you, our contributing authors, for sharing your brave stories. We are moving full speed ahead towards publication. Our goal is closer than ever!



After multiple consultations with our online publisher, we have been advised that the book is still a few months away from being published. We have been working diligently on every phase of the book to ensure it achieves its creative zenith.



Additionally, we are delighted to announce that we have received yet another cross dresser’s wife’s story. This additional narrative will surely buttress the book.



Stay tuned for updates on this much-anticipated collection of stories about our secret lives as cross dressers wives.



With blessings and gratitude,

The Founder



_______________________________



INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE



“Women are like tea bags. They don’t know how strong they are until they get into hot water.” Eleanor Roosevelt (1884 – 1962)

Cross Dressers Wives September’s Newsletter 2010 Topic for The Month: My Gratitude

Dear Friends,

I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for your much needed participation on our worldwide forum. Your contributions, input, sharing, understanding, insights, strength, openness, and compassion have provided invaluable support for cross dressers wives all over the world, including myself! All of your posts fuel the engine that drive this site.

Almost five years ago, I was in the maddening throes of desperation, confusion, and isolation. There seemed to me no way out. My back was up against the wall and there was no one there with me.

Even though I was in therapy, my therapist was very limited in how she could help me. I searched and searched for answers and could find none. As an academic and a feminist, I realized I had to find my own way, but how could I find other women in my position?

My therapist recommended a healing center in Sedona and there it hit me like a ton of bricks. It was the spiritual healers (who knew absolutely nothing about me) that encouraged me to take action by taking back my life. First, I had to get a website up for cross dressers wives, then write a book, and the idea would propel itself onwards from there. In addition to getting the word out, I was helping myself and helping others.

I was desperate for help. After losing my home, family, and the love of my life, I had been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. A key thing the first healer said was that I had suffered “severe sexual abuse in my marriage.” I had never thought of my husband’s cross dressing in those terms. Then, when I thought about it more carefully, I realized (with her help) that this was definitely a part of the pain and trauma.

Many times, what gets lost in the tsunami of misunderstood emotion is the simple fact that many of us feel our husbands gradually slipping away. Hopefully, we are developing new ways to defeat that sense of powerlessness. Thank you!

With Gratitude and Blessings,
The Founder

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


FREE PHONE CONSULTATION

We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April we began our Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, however, she is a former cross dressers wife. lease book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting us at cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.

CONSULTATION TESTIMONIALS

"...the hour I spent speaking with you made me feel better than the year I spent in therapy."

"...after my consultation with the founder, I realized my therapist was not the expert on cross dressers wives - the founder was."

"…the advice I received from the founder about setting boundaries was a big help to my marriage."

"Thank you founder for providing much needed resources for me."

"...I cannot tell you how blessed I felt to have someone I could talk to about this that has shared this experience."

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


DONATIONS AND VOLUNTEERS

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands.) A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


BOOK UPDATE

Dear Authors,
Thank you for sharing the brave stories that will inevitably help cross dressers wives and their families the world over. It is our ultimate goal to help illuminate a path towards better understanding of this often-misunderstood condition that has affected us all. By drawing this topic out of the darkest closets, you are helping to provide an educational resource that will encourage other cross dressers wives to open up and share their emotional stories.
We are thrilled to announce that our deadline for the book, unforeseen circumstances notwithstanding, to our online publisher is October 1, 2010. If we are still awaiting your signed contract or author questions from the editor, please provide this information at your very earliest convenience.
We will keep everyone updated on this much-anticipated collection of stories about our lives as cross dressers wives.
With blessings and gratitude,
The Founder

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE

" I know in each moment I am free to decide." (Your Sacred Self, by Dr. Wayne Dryer, Page 4).

Cross Dressers Wives August Newsletter 2010

Topic for the month: Female Cross Dressers

So many people associate cross-dressing solely with men. It is important to acknowledge that many scientists uphold transvestites can be men or women. However, it is much more noticeable to see a man dressed up in woman’s clothing and realize he is either a transvestite, transgender or transsexual, but it is not as noticeable for a woman.

Many women wear lots of men’s clothing styles; such as masculine jeans, bulky sweatshirts, flannel shirts, work boots, and even business suits. The difference is, some societies do not place the same stigma on women for wearing men’s clothes, in or out of the bedroom.

It is interesting to note, The DSM-III-R (the bible for psychologists and psychiatrists) in the past have not included women as transvestites. Some social scientists argue that women who wear men’s clothing cannot be considered transvestites because they do not have sexual or erotic feelings while dressing in men’s clothes. However, other scientists will argue that there are women cross dressers and that some of them do claim to find cross-dressing sexually pleasurable. Some women cross dressers have claimed that simply dressing in a man’s suit results in immediate sexual gratification (Cross Dressings, Sex, And Gender by Vern L. and Bonnie Bullough pgs. 302-303).

This is another demonstrative case in point where social scientists are not all in agreement with the multifaceted issues of cross-dressing. Is it any wonder why so many cross dressers wives are confused!?



Blessings,

The Founder



______________________________________________

FREE PHONE CONSULTATION

We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April we began our Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, however, she is a former cross dressers wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting us at cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.

______________________________________________



Donations and Volunteers



We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.

______________________________________________

Book Update

Our book, about our Lives As Cross Dressers Wives, is currently being edited. We have two new foreign stories. Please know anyone interested in submitting her story may contact us at cdwives@gmail.com. All of our stories are anonymous and all participants will receive compensation for their five to twenty-five page story. Please note; we are not seeking writers per say, just your story to enlighten others about the experiences of some cross dressers wives.

______________________________________________

Inspirational Quote


“All the answers to all the questions you are ever going to ask are right here within you. Every time you say, ‘I don’t know,’ you shut the door to your own wisdom.”

(Taken from Louise Hay’s, Heart Thoughts: A Treasury of Inner Wisdom, page 78.)

Cross Dressers Wives July Newsletter 2010

Topic of the Month: His Lingerie

As many of you have stated on the forum and in our survey, it is highly common for many cross dressers to wear silky feminine clothes and or lingerie.

In the book, 7 Secrets, by Lacy Leigh, she addresses the issue of the bedroom trap (pg.118). In essence the aforementioned acknowledges that if your encounters with your cross dressing husband is virtually only in the bedroom and he is wearing lingerie, it is very common for the wife/partner to assume cross dressing is all about sex. However, it is much more complicated than that.

According to many hundreds of our forum posts and to our surveys, some cross dressers only ‘dress up’ the bedroom. In fact, our uncontrolled and random sample survey indicates the following:

15% of cross dressing husbands only dress in lingerie while in the bedroom.
10% do not dress in lingerie according to their wives/partners.
25% of cross dressers wives chose not to answer this question.
50% answered that sometimes their husbands dress in lingerie in the bedroom.

Many cross dressers claim they just love the feel of silk on them. However, so many of our stories indicate that even when we purchase silk men’s underwear for them, they choose not to wear it. Logic would dictate that it is not SILK that drives them to wear silky lingerie.

Social scientists are still debating why this occurs. All we know for sure is that some cross dressers only dress in lingerie while in the bedroom. However, that is not to say they are not cross dressing in other pieces of woman’s clothing when we are not present. Perhaps they are wearing lingerie under their everyday clothes.

Lacy Leigh urges cross dressers to disclose this information early on in the relationship. She also suggests to cross dressers not to scare their wives (who do not know yet, or just found out) by cross dressing in front of them. Leigh states, You’ll only reinforce her worst fears if you begin too soon (pg117). For many of us, our worst fears have materialized in the form of silk…


Blessings,
The Founder
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FREE PHONE CONSULTATION
We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April we began our Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, however, she is a former cross dressers wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting us at cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.
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Donations and Volunteers

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.
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Book Update

Our book, Our Lives As Cross Dressers Wives, is currently being edited. Anyone interested in submitting her story may contact us at cdwives@gmail.com. All of our stories are anonymous and all participants will receive compensation for their five to twenty-five page story. Please note; we are not seeking writers per say, just your story to enlighten others about the experiences of some cross dressers wives.
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Inspiration Quote

It’s a good thing we have the denial system, because it allows us to cover our wounds and still function. But once we no longer have any wounds or any poisons, we don’t need to lie anymore.” (The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz).

Cross Dressers Wives June Newsletter 2010

Topic of the Month: Our Health

Welcome to all participants of our Forum and website. Many have expressed problems and concerns regarding their general well-being, as well as their physical and emotional health.

We have examined the survey results of an informal randomly selected sample of fifty cross dresser wives. Here are the results:

1) 36% indicated they are experiencing suicidal thoughts.
2) 47% are currently taking anti-depressants, anti-anxiety and/ or sleeping medication.
3) 73% have never been on these types of medication prior to being exposed to their cross dressing partners.
4) 57% are presently undergoing psychotherapy due to these circumstances. (Many other women have indicated that they would seek therapy if it were affordable to them.)

It is vital to understand that this was not a controlled, scientific study. However, it is relevant to note that there appears to be a direct correlation between cross dressers wives and these maladies. Find comfort in knowing you are not alone if you are encountering these aforementioned conditions.

On a less formal note, in my many years of study on this topic, I have found some of these other symptoms to be typical: alcoholism, drug addiction, erratic behavior, lack of energy, depression, anxiety, and many other negative symptoms.

Here are some helpful tips that may benefit your health and well-being:

1) Build a support team (friends, close family members, religious or spiritual leader.)
2) Seek counseling.
3) Exercise increases your endorphins (yoga, Pilates, walking, bike riding, and swimming, etc.)
4) Meditation.
5) Eat healthy foods and drink plenty of water.
6) Journal or read a good uplifting book.
7) Try to get twenty minutes of sunshine daily (increases endorphins, vitamin D, and combats insomnia.)
8) Open your shades and try to get outside everyday (maintain good grooming and personal hygiene.)
9) Pray if so inclined.
10) Befriend and communicate with another cross dressers wife from this Forum.

Remember to LOVE yourself!


FREE PHONE CONSULTATION
We are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. In April we began our Consultation Services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences and has worked with over one thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, however, she is a former cross dressers wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting us at cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.

Donations and Volunteers

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.


Book Update

Our book, Our Lives As Cross Dressers Wives, is currently being edited. Anyone interested in submitting her story may contact us at cdwives@gmail.com. All of our stories are anonymous and all participants will receive compensation for their five to twenty-five page story. Please note; we are not seeking writers per say, just your story to enlighten others about the experiences of some cross dressers wives.



Inspirational Quote

“Write down any positive feedback you’ve ever gotten, from other people or from circumstances. Put copies of this feedback list everywhere, and read it often” (Finding Your Own North Star authored by Martha Beck).

Cross Dressers Wives May Newsletter 2010

Topic Of The Month: Take advantage of our May only Free 15 minute phone consultation.

For the month of May we are offering a free 15-minute phone consultation. Last month we began our consultation services with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, a M.A. in Social Sciences and has worked with over a thousand cross dressers wives. She is not a licensed therapist, however, she is a former cross dressers wife. Please book your free 15-minute phone consultation by contacting us at cdwives@gmail.com. Our basic fee is $50 an hour.
____________________
Donations and Volunteers

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times, funds are short, limiting our ability to expand and help those in need. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who seek assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or volunteer your services to help us assist these women who are in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous consequences. It is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival.

____________________

Book Update

Our book, Our Lives As Cross Dressers Wives, is currently being edited. Anyone interested in submitting her story may contact us at cdwives@gmail.com. All of our stories are anonymous and all participants will receive compensation for their five to twenty-five page story. Please note; we are not seeking writers per say, just your story to enlighten others about the experiences of some cross dressers wives.


Inspirational Quote

“I know I am strengthened as I seek to make truth my personal reality” (Your Sacred Self by Wayne Dyer, page 222).

Cross Dressers Wives April Newsletter 2010

Topic Of The Month: Spring is time for renewal.

Many of us are struggling with ways to renew ourselves. Now is the perfect time!

What do we have in our power in order to change our lives? We hold the key by accepting the fact that being married to a cross dresser is no easy task. For many of us however, it is a multi-task learning process. The journey of acceptance begins by coming to terms with the fact that we do not possess the power to change our cross dressing spouses/partners. We only have the power to change ourselves, no easy task. This precious knowledge can lead to a sense of peace and serenity. Take this power, refocus your energies each day and change your life one step at a time.

Spring is a great time to focus on self-renewal. A part of our new beginning in the renewal process comes from accepting what has been lost in many of our relationships and to discover ways to bring about new life skills for self-renewal. This is our time to blossom but we need to make sure we have sufficient water, food, sun and TLC to do so! The key is to be good and kind to ourselves and the rest will begin to fall into place.

Blessings,
The Founder

________________________________________________________________
Donations and Volunteers

We are a charitable, nonprofit organization. All donations are tax deductible. We rely solely on donations and grants to support our much-needed services. During these difficult financial times funds are short, limiting our ability to expand. Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop outreach programs for worldwide cross dressers wives who are in need of assistance and support. Please visit our links to make a contribution or to volunteer your services in order to help us assist these women who are in dire need of; support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence, denial and guilt. This has not come without enormous struggles, pain, confusion and sometimes severe consequences. For most of us, it is comforting to know that we are not alone! There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique needs must be met. Any contributions will be greatly appreciated. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our, "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor may often be essential for our survival. ________________________________________________________________
New Consultation Link

We are elated to announce a new service and outreach program for those wives who are in need of one-on-one telephone support. The Founder is not a licensed therapist, though holds a degree in Women’s Studies and has earned a M.A. in Social Sciences. Additionally, she has worked with literally thousands of cross dressers wives for years. This service is now available for $50 an hour by appointment only. Please contact The Founder at cdwives@gmail.com for an appointment or more information.
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Inspirational Quote

“ When you always do your best, you take action”. ( The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz).

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Inspirational Books

Transitions by William Bridges
Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck

Cross Dressers Wives March Newsletter 2010

Topic for the month: Healing Process

There have been many posts inquiring how to begin the healing process. Some techniques work better for some, but it is to our advantage to experiment on a diversity of healing tools and skills to see which ones help each individual.

According to Dr. Susan Forward’s book, When Your Lover Is a Liar, writing a letter of grief from the standpoint of a fighter-not a victim is the key. She upholds it is vital to take a firm stand with your grief and display your determination to get through it. Some would suggest writing the letter and sharing it with your husband/partner, keep it for yourself, burn it or rip it up. The important element is to release your emotions in a healthy way in order to help you get passed your grief. Dr. Forward also states that adding a bit of humor can also be beneficial (page 135).

Additionally, confrontation can be a positive way to find clarity. Learn to ask for what you need, want, desire and set clear boundaries for a happier and healthy lifestyle. What is best for you is always a personal choice. Nonetheless, healing is a way to begin your new life.

To further enhance your new life, Dr. Jane Greer suggests in her book, How Could You Do This To Me?, there are many lessons to live by. She elaborates on the necessity to identify your true feelings and rebuild your self-esteem by trusting your emotions and your own judgment She purports that by utilizing these fundamental tasks, you will be able to trust again, with your heart and eyes wide open (page 180).


Donations and Volunteers

As a non-for-profit (NPO) charitable tax-deductible organization, we rely solely on contributions and grants to support our much-needed organization. Funds are low and grants during these difficult financial times are limiting our abilities to expand, despite the obvious need to do so. Every dollar can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO to develop outreach programs to worldwide cross dressers wives, who are in need of assistance. Please visit our links to make contributions or to volunteer your services to help us assist those women who are in need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence but not without enormous struggles, pain, confusion and sometimes-severe consequences. For most of us, it is comforting to know that we are not alone. There are millions of us in the United States alone, whose needs must be met. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor is vital.

New Consultation Link

We are elated to announce this new service and out reach to those wives who are in need of phone support. The Founder is not a therapist, those holds degrees in Women’s Studies and M.A. in Social Sciences. Additionally, she has worked with thousands of cross dressers wives for several years. This service is available now for $50 an hour by appointment only. Please contact the founder at cdwives@gmail.com

Inspirational Quote

“ You were born with the right to be happy. You were born with the right to love, enjoy and to share love. You are alive, so take your life and enjoy it ” by Don Miguel Ruiz from his book, The Four Agreements (page 84).

Cross Dressers Wives February's Newsletter 2010

Now That You Have Decided to Leave Him


Hope you and yours are all well. As always we are gearing this months newsletter towards a common theme from our forum. There has been a lot of correspondence from many cross dressers wives who are contemplating leaving their marriages and wondering how to leave. Please note, we are not encouraging anyone (other that someone who is being physically abused) to dissolve their marriage. However, for those who want and need to leave their marriage, we want to support their needs and desires.

Many cross dressers wives have been in a long term holding pattern waiting for the next high heel to drop, others contemplate leaving, some stay with boundaries, some live as roommates while others do end up divorcing their cross dressing husbands.


For those of you who wish to leave and are looking for ways to go on with your lives I would like to share a recent posting on the forum. I had her permission to post her comments in this newsletter. It is just one of many stories that I, like many of you, found it to be significant and helpful to those who want and need to reclaim their lives-without their spouses.

This post is from of our beloved Shelly


Dear How to: It sounds like you are in the same situation as I was in during the last few months of my marriage. Does this sound familiar to you: By the time my H realized that he had pushed me too far, that he was losing control over me, it was simply too late. I told him I was leaving. I had been lied to repeatedly, I had been blamed for not accepting him, I had been manipulated and isolated for yrs. He decided that we should start over, put everything behind us, and live happily ever after. He "stopped" cding. He began doing nice things for me, buying me things, becoming concerned about my welfare after yrs of ignoring and minimizing my feelings. But what was done could not be undone. The trust was gone, replaced by suspicion. The love was gone, replaced by a trapped fear. The sexual attraction was gone, replaced by repulsion. He didn't want to talk about cding or the past. I was "holding grudges" and "being unforgiving" if I brought up my doubts or questioned his honesty. I had so much to lose! I had pre-school children, no job, no higher education, my health was very bad after yrs of escalating stress, and my H had been threatening suicide for yrs if I told anyone. I could not live w/ the pain anymore, could not try - not one more time; I knew that if I allowed him back into my heart, I would not survive another betrayal - one that I knew would come, eventually. For me to get out, I had to make a decision to save myself and my kids, to give up my home and everything that I had invested in, and to face the overwhelming fears and uncertainties that made up my future.


How did I do it? 1) I finally told my family and gratefully received their unfaltering support. 2) I went to a psychologist - against the dictates of my H - and got on anti-anxiety medication to help me cope. 3) I mentally disassociated myself from my H, did not allow myself to make his problems my own - I had enough to worry about! 4) I began reading about abuse and manipulation, as suggested by the psychologist. 5) I did what I could to improve my health so that I could face the future as best I could. I think the hardest part was #3; b/c I had loved my H for over half my life and I didn't want to hurt him. I knew that he was in pain, that I was HURTING him - that was very hard; it is not my nature. I found that this helped: I wrote down specific incidents in which MY pain had been totally ignored and disregarded by my H, the many lies and distortions I had been dealing with, the aggressive blame and shameless twisting of reality that he had used for yrs to control my actions and thoughts. This allowed me to keep clear in my mind what I would not allow in my life. It was a very painful time, but I kept my eyes focused on the light at the end of the tunnel - a light that wasn't there if I didn't leave. I have never regretted it. After I left, when I was packing more of my stuff, I found the stash of women's clothing he had hidden in a new place. My mind, to this day, still tends to empathize w/ him, even after he remarried, yrs later, to yet another woman w/out telling her about his sexuality. It's so sad. It just starts all over again. Hope this helps you. This is such a difficult place to be in. If you need out, I hope you can find a way.

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New Help line Services



Look for our upcoming new link for our new help line service. We are elated to announce this new service and out reach to those wives who are in need of phone support. The Founder is not a therapist, those holds degrees in woman studies and social sciences. Additionally, she has worked with thousands of cross dressers wives for several years. This service should be available soon for $50 an hour.

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Book Update



We are pleased to announce that our book about our lives as cross dressers wives will be published within the next 3-6months. If you are interested in submitting your story please read November 2009 Newsletter and submit your story by February 15th.

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Donations and Volunteer Positions


As a non-for-profit (NPO) charitable tax-deductible organization, we rely solely on contributions and grants to support our much-needed organization. Funds are low and grants during these difficult financial times are limiting our abilities to expand, despite the obvious need to do so. Every dollar can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO to develop outreach programs to worldwide cross dressers wives, who are in need of assistance. Please visit our links to make contributions or to volunteer your services to help us assist those women who are in need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion and guidance. Many of us have lived in complete silence but not without enormous struggles, pain, confusion and sometimes-severe consequences. For most of us, it is comforting to know that we are not alone. There are millions of us in the United States alone, whose needs must be met. Only other cross dressers wives have ever walked in our "high heels" (except for many of our cross dressing husbands). A sense of humor is vital.

______________________________________________________



Recommended reading:



When Your Lover is a Liar by Dr. Susan Forward


How Could You Do This To Me? Learning To Trust After Betrayal by Dr. Jane Greer


The Liar in Your Life by Robert Feldman

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Inspirational Quote



"I am wise and capable. I am my own best expert, my own authority about what is right for me. I have the courage to listen to my inner wisdom. (From the book, The Woman's Book of Courage by Sue Patton Thoele pg. 137)

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Happy Valentines Day!!! Remember to love yourself.



Blessings,

The Founder