Friday, May 15, 2009

Greetings! Welcome to the first Cross Dressers Wives Monthly Newsletter! As the genesis of our newsletter, this is the perfect opportunity to explain how Cross Dressers Wives came into existence and how it has exponentially grown.

Cross Dressers Wives is a not for profit organization (NPO) that was established in 2006. The impetus behind this NPO and website is the simple fact that when I left my cross-dressing husband of twenty years I was in desperate need of support, guidance, understanding, information and contact with other cross-dressers’ wives who were experiencing similar feelings of betrayal, loss, confusion, emotional and psychological abuse. The blatant need for supporting cross-dressers’ wives was a necessity. Necessity is the mother of creation.

My therapist tried to help, though she knew so little about the underpinnings and consequences of unknowingly being a cross-dressers wife. She referred me to a gender center that dealt specifically with this complex, multi-faceted issue. The gender center therapist, who had been working with cross-dressers and their wives/partners for over a decade, referred me to several websites, which she insisted could meet my needs. Thinking I finally found help, my expectations were high. The moment I went home, I began my cyberspace search for much needed assistance. However, to my utter disappointment, rather than acknowledging my feelings, these sites questioned their validity and did not address my questions and concerns. To my dismay and shock I came across websites designed by cross-dressers, which encourage unconditional acceptance of their life-long conditions and overwhelmingly suggested the wives/partners participate in activities together, including shopping trips and beauty salon outings. They often encourage wives to just enjoy the feminine side of their cross-dressing husbands, while downplaying and normalizing their life long condition, with little acknowledgement of the wives/partners who are hurt by it.

As an educated woman, I know cross dressers’ wives are not a monolithic group. Nonetheless, I could not locate a site that came close to matching any of my needs, beliefs, opinions, emotions, or experiences. Some sites were religiously based, advising wives to go to their nearest church for an annulment. Other sites would not allow me to participate, as they would not permit the wives of lingerie cross dressing husbands to write anything that could be deemed as sexualized. In essence, I was lost and more traumatized than ever.

Logic dictated I could not be alone. One day I realized the only way I could find other cross-dressers’ wives would be by creating a cyberspace safe haven for them to come out of their dark, secretive closets, share their stories, support each other and provide and share information. Ultimately, we established a community of our own. The end result was the birth of Cross Dressers Wives.

Our site has flourished more than I could have ever imagined. Last year we only had 400 visits per month. We are now receiving over 140,000 visits per month, worldwide. Additionally, our site was recommended by the National News Column Annie's Mailbox, March 2, 2009. Please follow the following link to read the column: http://www.creators.com/lifestylefeatures/annies-mailbox/annie-s-mailbox-r-2009-03-02.html.

The success of Cross Dressers Wives is solely due to all of you. Your input, postings, honesty, strength, inquiries, and support of each other have made the site what it is: SUCCESSFUL. The foundational bricks of this site are represented by the courage and stories of each and every one of you. Each of your stories is a brick in the foundation of this strong community. From the bottom of my heart THANK YOU!!

On another note, we rely solely on tax-deductible donations, as grants are difficult for all non-profits to obtain at this time. Times are tough and we are struggling financially to maintain and expand our organization by providing new innovative supportive services. Every tax-deductible dollar will be anonymous, as we will never disclose a list of our donors to anyone at anytime for any reason. Just five dollars or one dollar can help us exponentially grow Cross Dressers Wives. Please visit our donations link on the donations/volunteer page on the site. We thank you in advance for your much needed immediate support. In the meantime may all of you love yourselves enough to take good care of yourselves. You are all worthy of support, truth, peace, happiness and love.

Please note that future Cross Dressers Wives Monthly Newsletters will be posted on the first of every month. We apologize for the delay in the issuance of May's Newsletter.

With Blessings and Gratitude,


The Founder
www.crossdresserswives.com

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