Topic For The Month: TV and I Do Not Mean TranVestites!
Dee’s Corner…
Ladies we have been approached again by well known, highly reputable, award- winning TV Producers to come forward and tell our stories. They are looking for trailblazers,
Cross Dresssing husbands and their wives to reveal their unique experiences.
We are not being pursued by a “Jerry Springer show’- I have ignored ALL requests
such as that.
Instead it is a much more of a dignified setting, with counselors, etc. Idealistically, we
are looking for couples in the LA area to do a sizzling reel-that will only be seen by TV executives. However, please notify us if you are interested and live outside LA. It will
never be shown to the public. Please let me know if you are interested. Yes, we are
also looking for Cross Dressers Wives (CDW) – ex’s too- to share their stories.
We are here to share your voices…
Blessings and Gratitude,
Dee A Levy
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Tim’s corner…our CD family advisor. He is so busy helping other couples. As so
many of you know, he has had some great success helping those in dire need.
Many CDH have claimed it was so easy for them to talk to Tim. Of course Tim is
not going to ‘cure’ your husband’s CD but he manages to get a lot of them to
understand what you are going through, which ultimately helps you too. We think
he should write a book for cross dressers- just about his experiences working in
this extraordinary field. Tim-you can and should do it!!!
timcdfamilyadvisor@yahoo
Dorothy Hayden’s Corner
Dismayed that your CD husband started dressing again after months or
years of abstinence?
It's understandable that what you thought was an issue he had left behind him has
re-appeared. You feel discouraged, dismayed and angry.
The fact is, therapists, psychoanalysts and medical doctors have tried a great number
of treatments for CD and, as far as I know, there has not been one documented case
of a man being “cured” of it for the rest of his life. Some clinicians have claimed
cure but have not followed up to see if the “cure” remained.
Since cross-dressing is no longer seen as a disease or a psychopathology, there
can be no “cure”. With therapy a CD can learn to modulate his impulses to some
degree, but the desire always remains. When he is going through stress or
emotional upheaval, there's a good chance that he's return to what makes
him feel safe and secure – and that's dressing.
Trying to “cure” cross-dressing is like trying to cure homosexuality. Perhaps some combination of pre-natal “androgens”, unbalanced in the mother's womb, together
with a maternal figure that was either too enmeshed or too distant explains the phenomenon. Either way, therapists now see CD as a life-long condition.
If a person is an alcoholic, he/she can either be active or sober, but an alcoholic
he remains. Also like addiction, it is prone to relapse.
If your husband has returned to dressing after a period of staying “dry”, then
something is probably going on with him emotionally and a wise way to
proceed is to try to have understanding and empathy for what that is.
Dorothy Hayden, LCSW
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Questionnaire II UPDATE
Over the past year nearly 300 wives of cross dressers have completed this survey,
making it the largest group ever to participate in a wives study of this kind. Thanks
to each of you! If you have not responded to Questionnaire II please do so, and be
sure to respond to all of the questions. We are starting to analyze the survey
data and the results will be made available on this web site.
Additionally, a more formal report will be submitted to one of the scientific journals concerned with transgender studies, such as the International Journal of
Transgenderism or the Archives of Sexual Behavior. The main focus of additional
research will involve asking wives in more detail about how they are coping
with cross dressing. Of course, we'll be inviting each of you to join us in these
on-going research projects.
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HOTLINE Cross Dressers Wives NPO offers live telephone consultation services
with The Founder. She holds a BA in Women Studies, an M.A. in Social Sciences,
and has worked with thousands of cross dressers’ wives. The Founder is not
a licensed therapist; she is a former cross dresser’s wife.
Additionally, Dee A Levy also consults with many cross dressers- most seeking
advice on how to disclose their secret to their clueless wives. Please book
The basic fee is $50 an hour. The first 15 minutes are free.
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HOTLINE TESTIMONIALS “When I read the book with my cross dressing
husband, we both cried! It was so helpful to first read the book- then consult with Dee” “
I felt so much better after talking to someone who really understood how much my
husbands CD hurt me so much. I was relieved.” “You are the only person I trust”
“My therapist does not understand me but your Forum does” "You have no idea.
You’ve saved my life.” "I cannot tell you how blessed I felt to have someone
I could talk to about this that has shared this experience." "The advice I received
from the Founder about setting boundaries was a big help to my marriage."
"The hour I spent speaking with you made me feel better than the year I spent
in therapy." "After my consultation, I realized my therapist was not the expert
on cross dressers’ wives - the Founder is."
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DONATIONS; VOLUNTEER We are a charitable, non-for profit organization.
All donations are tax deductible. Presently, we rely almost solely on donations and
grants to support our much-needed services. In difficult financial times, funds are
short, limiting our ability to expand our Hotline and international outreach resources.
Every dollar we raise can assist Cross Dressers Wives NPO develop worldwide
programs for cross dressers wives seeking assistance and support.
Please visit our links to purchase our book via paypal, make a financial contribution,
or volunteer your services to help us assist women in dire need of support, education, acceptance, understanding, compassion, and guidance. Many of us have lived in
complete silence, denial, and guilt. This does not come without enormous
consequences. Sometimes, it is simply comforting to know that we are not alone.
There are millions of us in the United States and throughout the world whose unique
needs must be met. All contributions are greatly appreciated. For privacy purposes, donations made by check may be made payable to ‘CDW’ Or ‘CROSS DRESSERS WIVES.’ Credit card donations made via PayPal appear as ‘CDW.’
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Inspirational Quote of the Month…
"Our ambition should be to rule ourselves, the true kingdom for each one of us;
and true progress is to know more, and be more, and to do more."
Sir John Lubbock
